Holly Springs Passes Halloween Ordinance Encouraging Teens to Go Fuck Some Shit Up
Holly Springs passed an ordinance in their October town council meeting that sent a strong message to area teens this Halloween: stop with the kiddie stuff and go raise hell. Item one of ‘Resolution Urging a Safe Halloween’, which sounds almost as cool as Operation...
Death by Chocolate, a Delicious Dessert and an Existential Crisis in One
By James Israel Nine out of 10 doctors agree: food is the most edible thing you can eat (the 10th doctor choked on the questionnaire.) But is it possible for food to be so delicious that it is deadly?* Introducing “Death by Chocolate Cake,” a dessert that openly...
Entire city of Concord, NC, mass hallucinates Trump pledge (Alternatively, our president has forgotten how cameras work)
President Donald Trump this week, wondered out loud what kind of man would ask a stranger to give him an oath of loyalty, in what would appear to be the start of an existential crisis.
Asst. Principal finds new way to suck at life
“Skiiiiiiiiinnnneeerrrr!!”
Brave principal saves class of 2017 from the sight of exposed clavicle bone
Over the weekend Hickory Ridge High School in Harrisburg held their graduation ceremony with one notable absence: Bond. Summer Bond.
Trump admin. forced to choose between hate of jihadists and love of hate
In 2016, a team led by UNC-Chapel Hill researchers (i.e., nerds) won a nearly $900,000 grant to develop information campaigns to counter jihadist and white supremacist recruiting, which is great news as everybody hates jihadists (coming to CBS this fall), but bad news...
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